Donna is only one of many waiting, worrying, and wishing for answers and a different outcome…an outcome where health is restored and the normalcy of everyday life can return.
Today I sat with my simple lunch in a waiting area tucked away from the everyday hubbub of the space I was becoming all too familiar with. Despite it being a new wing, not many traveled through the automatic doors or sat upon the comfortable leather chairs. I discovered it the last time I was here a couple of weeks ago, and remembered the peace and tranquility that surrounded it. I couldn’t help but appreciate looking out at the sky through the giant windows that were an oddity in the hospital. It’s sky view was a luxury in a place where patients tend to lie in dark quiet rooms to heal, and contrasting fluorescent lights blind you when you venture outside of those, down the crazy maze of halls.
As I looked out at the gray scene, I spotted a well dressed woman in full makeup and carefully coiffed hair. She was dropped off at the door, while I finished the last bites of my tasteless lunch. A carefully placed cane used to stabilize her cautious slow steps forward, proceeded her as she stepped into the lounging area. She and I were the only ones in the large, almost cavernous space, and I looked up to smile and greet her when she let out a loud breathy sigh at her journey’s end. She smiled back and after introducing herself as Donna and exchanging pleasantries of the day, she spoke to me in hushed cautious tones about her family’s tragic health dilemmas.
Cancer
She just finished chemo treatment, her husband would likely not recover from liver cancer, and they were visiting her young, newly married son who was in surgery for multiple growths on his spine.
We bonded in the many weighty minutes that unfolded in front of us, and eventually ended our conversation with a shared exchange of prayers, well wishes, and hope for peace.
I dropped my head in heartache after she left. Then, after quiet contemplation, the realization of her powerful inner strength began to take hold of me. I then slowly lifted my head and looked out at the scene through the windows again. But this time, instead of the gray skies and the spitting rain that seemed to never let up, I spotted a beautiful hint of spring.
Was it a sign of hope, and renewal? I stood up and made my way outside to experience it up close and breathe in the beauty of the early blossoming redbud tree.
It wasn’t an answer to my many difficult questions, but it brought me a moment of distraction and satisfying relief.
As I sifted through new music tonight, I worried I might not find a song that expressed my mood today. Then, I miraculously heard this song.
How can I not be in awe of music which speaks to me so perfectly? I hope it speaks to you.
Jay Som-Pirouette
“Drink feels good, but it feels so rough
There’s room for calm when the going gets tough
So empty and blue, a beaten heart aches
For more and more and more
[Chorus]
Ah-ah-ah, backwards again
Ah-ah-ah, back to the sins
I pray for answers beneath the moon
[Verse 2]
Sinking moon sits on our heads
Why do we try when it’s all pretend?
Ashamed of use, can’t get out of bed ‘cause
Sleep’s a must, it’s our best friend
[Bridge]
Our bodies crease and piece
Release buried beneath
The time will come when all is done
Moon will sleep with the tides
[Chorus]
Ah-ah-ah, backwards again
Ah-ah-ah, back to the sins
I pray for answers beneath the moon
I pray for answers beneath the moon
I pray for answers beneath the moon
Beneath the moon
[Chorus]
Ah-ah-ah, backwards again
Ah-ah-ah, back to the sins
I pray for answers beneath the moon
I pray for answers beneath the moon
I pray for answers beneath”
Jay Som represents Melina Duterte, a singer, songwriter, and multi-instrumentalist out of Oakland. The name, Jay Som, is what Duterte randomly found via an online baby name generator meaning “Victory Moon.”
After much success from her album last year, Everybody Works, she recently released a new 7 inch via Polyvinyl Records with two tracks that she felt didn’t really fit on the album. “Pirouette” was one song and “O.K., Meet Me Underwater” was the other.
According to a press statement from Jay Som,
“Both of these tracks were made during the spring of 2016 – the first demo stages for Everybody Works. They were fun to write and record but felt out of place on the track list during the finalization of the album. These tracks remain close to my heart and I’m really grateful they’re finally out in the world.”
“Pirouette” exemplifies Jay Som’s signature guitar fuzz, soft hazy vocals, and contemplative lyrics. Ending in almost two minutes of instrumentals, it captures a mantra of sound that hypnotizes and captivates the listener. As I play it on repeat, I recognize the whirl of music to be balanced and resplendent like the pirouette of a ballerina. Raw in its aural intensity, the music provides a backdrop for the much needed answers we all seem to long for, at one time or another.
Check it out and click to learn more…
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