Do you know the Moms of your good friends?
It is a question that I ask myself after scrolling through picture after picture posted on various social media sites for Mother’s Day. I have friends who consider their Mom to be the absolute bomb, and I have those that have lost their Mom too soon and miss them every single day.
It got me to thinking about the unique friendship between a Mom and their child. The idea of getting to know the Mom of a dear friend that you love, may be a life changing, eye opening event.
I think back in my life about my closest friendships. I feel incredibly fortunate to be surrounded by amazing friends, and yes for some, I was introduced and happily engaged in regular small talk with their Moms. Today I wonder… did I find out what made them tick? What was their life like in college? What funny stories can they tell me about their children…my friend? What hardships did they overcome?
You get the picture.
Looking into my own life, I realize the incredible substance that my mother played in my own personal growth. No, I am not a direct clone of hers…despite our amazingly similar looks, but honestly, I find that I am an apple that stays magnetically close to the tree.
I imagine that my near and dear friends harbor characteristics of their own Moms. The good, the bad, and the ugly. I wish I had taken the time to learn more. Growing up we spent much more time avoiding parents than we did learning about them. I suppose that is the natural order of things, but now my friend’s parents are either ill, far away, or sadly gone….I really wish I knew more.
The snippets of stories I garnish from friends about their Moms is so distinct and provides incredible insight into their unique personality. It makes so much sense to me that a close friend’s family gathering is one I should make every effort to attend.
Weddings are a big part of this generational gathering. Small towns and close neighborhoods also assemble people and family. I am suggesting that maybe we should take the time to do it more. Include parents in our lives, get to know them, and listen.
Maybe Mother’s Day is hard for you. Perhaps you are feeling horrific sadness because there is an empty chair where your Mom once sat, or maybe your relationship is horribly severed due to years of pain and hurt. Despite the difficulty of sharing the darkness of your suffering, shouldn’t your closest friends be there to know and understand?
Maybe today is a day you celebrate everything spectacular about your Mom. The care and tenderness they provided for the years of your growing could be incredible insight into what makes you tick and what makes you tock.
Especially on a day like today, Mother’s Day.
You, who are on the road must have a code that you can live by.
And so become yourself because the past is just a good bye.
Teach your children well, their father’s hell did slowly go by,
And feed them on your dreams, the one they fix, the one you’ll know by.
Don’t you ever ask them why, if they told you, you would cry,
So just look at them and sigh and know they love you.And you, of the tender years can’t know the fears that your elders grew by,
And so please help them with your youth, they seek the truth before they can die.
Teach your parents well, their children’s hell will slowly go by,
And feed them on your dreams, the one they fix,the one you’ll know by.
Don’t you ever ask them why, if they told you, you would cry,
So just look at them and sigh and know they love you.
